Friday Fictioneers is a group of bloggers that write 100-word stories after being inspired by a photo posted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. We are allowed to use the photo in our post and encouraged to leave each other comments. I always appreciate anyone who takes the time to leave a comment on any of my posts.
The photo prompt is often posted on Wednesday and a lot of writers post their story on Thursday, so I am going to do that this week. I will have two other posts for you tomorrow.
PHOTO PROMPT © Jean L. Hays
Losing Steam
His coffee didn’t have steam above it, unlike the cup in the window that he had been looking through for the last two hours. He knew he looked like a fool to the young waitress. The people who were in the café now did not know how long Stan had been there, but she did. She had watched his face lose its light as he sat waiting. Stan knew he should get up, but he decided to wait five more minutes. For 25 years of marriage he could wait two and half hours. Maybe this time Gayle wouldn’t disappoint him.
Failing at Haiku 
Great title, and a touching and economically drawn picture of the loss of love.
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I liked the way you you used the waitresses’ observation to indicate his long wait. Looks like the marriage is truly over. Time to move to the pub.
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Thank you Patrick! And yes, I don’t think she’s coming.
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Oh – I wonder what can change… Hope can be a foolish friend.
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Thanks for stopping by Bjorn! Yes, sometimes you have to let go…
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Some think there is always hope…and there can be for a long time, but eventually it runs out! Hopefully, his won’t.
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Thanks for stopping and reading my story JC!
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When I had a wine bar I often saw folk nursing a single drink for ages and looking at their watches every now and again. a brilliant take on the picture.
Visit Keith’s Ramblings!
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I have only been in a bar twice in my life, so thank you for your observation Keith!!
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Oh poor guy. I think it’s time for him to move on…
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I agree, thanks for stopping by and leaving me a comment Dale!
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Touching, and a great connection to the photo. Love the title!
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Thank you Joy! I love the photos that get chosen.
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Don’t think she’s going to show… TIme to move on!
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Yes, the idea of moving on into the new year must have spilled over into my writing. Thanks for reading Roger!
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There’s clearly a deeper story below the surface. I can only hope it has a happy ending even if his coffee is cold!
Rosey Pinkerton’s blog
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I like the line about his face losing its light. I think its meaning is clear (he’s losing hope), but it also works if someone interprets it to mean losing the sunlight.
It sounds as though she’s left him before…poor guy.
Great story–looking forward to more in 2016!
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Thanks Jan!! With the support of blogger friends I will continue to write more short stories. I did mean to show he was losing his hope and I jumped off of a line that you read so often about the sunlight fading.
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You’re inspiring me to get back to short fiction again! (then maybe you can polish my work, too. 🙂 )
Comments: Watch your “that”s. in the window that he had been
She had watched his face lose its light This is a bit unclear. Was he losing hope or was the sunlight fading?
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I like the word “that”. I know sometimes it seems unnecessary, but it is how I talk and it feels weird to leave it out of some sentences. Thanks for stopping by!
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I like this. Well done.
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Thank you taggart! It is always nice to hear that.
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